Instead of Five Gold Rings, as the Twelve Days of Christmas carol goes, we\u2019re giving you Five Gold\u2026en Rules of Feedback (Thank us later!)<\/p>\n
Giving and receiving feedback is difficult to do well. Very difficult in fact! But the more we do it, the better we\u2019ll become at it and the better we\u2019ll be as individuals \u2013 so it\u2019s worth investing some time in getting it right.<\/p>\n
Below are a few DO\u2019s and DON\u2019Ts to help you along the way\u2026<\/p>\n
DO get in first<\/strong> \u2013 if there is something in particular that you are working on, go to your colleagues, peers and managers and ask them to keep an eye out for behaviors that you are looking to change. This way, it\u2019s on your terms and you can start to get used to being told information about yourself and your behavior. It is also really helpful for the person offering the feedback because you have helped them direct their focus onto the things you have already identified as areas for development.<\/p>\n For example: \u201cI\u2019d like to get better at summarizing data and figures during monthly meetings. I\u2019m going to try and change this by describing only the key elements of the commercial factors that have changed and not ones that are relatively stable over a month. Can you let me know if this is having a more positive impact on you as a member of the team? If it is having a positive impact, can you explain to me what that is?\u201d<\/p>\n DO say thank you<\/strong> \u2013 when someone gives you feedback they are taking the time, and potentially putting themselves in an uncomfortable scenario, to help you get better or to commend you for something great \u2013 so it\u2019s really important that you thank them. When the feedback is positive, we often \u2018play it down\u2019 by saying things like \u201coh it\u2019s nothing\u201d or \u201cI\u2019m just doing my job\u201d. Take credit for your work! Try saying something like, \u201cthanks for that, I appreciate you taking the time to let me know how it had an impact on you.\u201d Allow yourself to feel good and feel motivated that you are having a positive influence on the people you are interacting with. The more you embrace it, the better it will flow into other areas of your life.<\/p>\n DON\u2019T justify or defend<\/strong> \u2013 you are simply receiving information about how somebody perceived a behavior of yours. You can\u2019t change that perception as it\u2019s in the past, you can only change the future! So try not to jump into defensive mode and do take the opportunity to really listen to what the person is saying to you. That old adage is really useful here: \u201cYou\u2019ve got two ears and one tongue, so do twice as much listening as speaking\u201d.<\/p>\n DO give specific examples<\/strong> \u2013 always give a specific example of the recipient\u2019s behavior that they can recognize\/remember. For this reason, it\u2019s best to deliver feedback as close to when you recognized the example behavior as possible. Basically, don\u2019t give an example from 6 months ago! Keep it relevant and timely. Make it relevant, make it recent and of course, remember that timing is important. Just because you\u2019ve been told to give \u201cin the moment feedback\u201d, you need to be very skilled at delivering it if there is a blazing row happening in the meeting room!<\/p>\n DO discuss the alternative<\/strong> \u2013 have an adult-to-adult conversation about what a suitable\/appropriate alternative behavior could be. When suggesting a change, remember that the question \u201cWhy?\u201d will be going around the recipient\u2019s head. Supporting them to identify an alternative will help them understand the effects of the original behavior better, while providing a clear action point as to how they can change\/modify it. Make sure the recipient understands and appreciates the outcome of not making the change in behavior (the consequences of not changing) or if motivational the outcome of continuing to behave in the identified way.<\/p>\n December is naturally a good time for reflection, so perhaps you could make it your mission this week to give or ask for some feedback. Let us know how you get on! @discoveryperf<\/p>\n <\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Instead of Five Gold Rings, as the Twelve Days of Christmas carol goes, we\u2019re giving you Five Gold\u2026en Rules of Feedback (Thank us later!) Giving and receiving feedback is difficult to do well. Very difficult in fact! 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